18

Theres nothing like a good buzz to last you mildly throughout the day. Props for dad for throwing me a 5 sack. He said whatever I do, don't do it before or during school, but of course I couldn't promise that.

I feel the same. I thought that shroom experience last weekend would bring some enlightenment that would follow me for the rest of my life. But it didn't. It's the weirdest thing. Because at the time, I really felt like I was down for anything. I was down for life, no matter what the fuck happens. But I don't know....it was like I was so far away from reality, I thought I was going to come back in it with all my philosophies. Reality is horrible. It's boring and theres like a thousand things about it that bothers me. I gotta stay away from it.

Something tells me if I get into a relationship, about 20-30 percent of my problems would be over with. I still gota deal with getting a job, staying OUT of thorton, etc etc etc...

I'm deciding to bite off Adrew and share what gives me simple pleasures...

-sparking a joint I just rolled
-coming home and petting my cat's head as he stretches from taking a nap
-walking into my clean ass room and turning on the tv
-listening to my ipod as I walk to my bus stop
-getting a txt that I've been waiting for a while
-seirra nevada beer
-her, the way she USED to be to me. Before she changed. She used to define all my happiness and now its just getting worse and worse as the days go on. It seems like if it went on for any longer, we'd be back to being strangers.